oh how i love tea....it makes a blah day better......( i also LOVE my new sugar bowl, makes me smile every day).
speaking of blah days, lets talk about passport photos....everyone's favorite thing to do right??? ha ha. i have to renew my passport this year. it is a british passport, and so of course the photo requirements are completely different to the american photo requirements, and so finding somewhere here in the states that knew how or what to do with that was somewhat ridiculous. throw in the metric system measurements and its like communicating in different languages.
this week i have been working on getting my passport application sent off and the most frustrating part was getting the passport photo. I have now had 4 sets of photos taken. the first lot were ok in measurement, but THE worst photo of me ever (well not ever, there are more then plenty terrible pictures of me). so i was trying to be grown up and indifferent about it, you know, "whatever, its a passport photo, who has a good passport photo anyways?"....but then yesterday after a long rough day, i just decided that as silly as it may be i hated the photo, it wasn't even good technically, i mean you couldn't even see my eyes in it, it was so dark, my application probably would have been rejected because of it! and it would be in my passport for the next 10 years! so i decided, as silly or as vain or whatever it was, i didn't care, i was getting another one done. thus my day consisted of three separate trips back and forth to fedex to work out the correct photo size and then getting a friend to sign it.....eventually i got a passable photo that i feel ok having in my passport. you can actually see that i have eyes! i am now exhausted. who knew passports photos would take an entire day (sort of) to figure out. but its all done now and i now await my new passport.
josh and i are shooting a wedding tomorrow.....the above picture is from one of the first weddings i ever officially shot for a friend in canada and this is still one of my all time favorite photos from any wedding i have done. its encouraging to have that one picture that i love. it gives me a little booster, a reminder that i took it and if i did it once i can do it again.
right now, as with every other wedding (which are not that many) i have photographed, i have the butterflies fluttering around in my belly, the struggle with my self confidence, and a bad attitude about it. (yip, that's brutal honesty). and as with every other wedding, i am re reading my favorite verses that remind me that my gifts are from God, and my strength is from him too, and that my hearts desire is to use them to glorify him. and as with every other wedding before i am trying to shout those verses and more positive thoughts louder then the other ugly thoughts that like to bring me down.
its been a rough week. a mini battle field within, and without. last night i almost had a break down when i burnt the chicken and made the mashed potatoes soggy, more like soup then mash. (nothing tea couldn't fix in a jiffy). even though these weddings have been tough for me emotionally, i am thankful that i can look at them and see how i have grown, and how i have learnt to completely rely on God, not only in the times when i feel completely weak and inadequate (weddings) but in every area of my life. however i do not think being a wedding photographer is going to be the direction i will be taking in life, at this point anyways. and that is ok, i am ok with that. happy even. it's been a good discovery to make. in the meantime, i will gather all the strength i can, and do the very best i can, to capture and bless this couple.
"i can do everything through him who gives me strength" - phil 4:13http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ehCFbVhT6o
the other night we were talking about a comedian that my parents enjoy, victor borges, and so after today's passport mission, the heaviness of this week, and the anxiety for tomorrow, i decided i needed a bit of a giggle. thought i would share the giggle. the link below is from one of his acts called "inflationary speech". enjoy, and have a "twoderful" weekend.
love p i p s